Sunday, October 14, 2007
Pierce's Challenge
Last Saturday at basketball practice, Pierce was touching some other kid's head while he waited in line. He didn't mean anything by it (that I can tell), but it was pretty clear the other kid was getting very irritated. From the sidelines I yelled for Pierce to knock it off. He stopped and life moved on. Until school the next day.
Tuesday morning Pierce told Nora that at recess the day before, he'd seen a 2nd grader on the playground whose hair looked soft and he tried to touch it. His reward? The 2nd grader and his friends chased Pierce around the playground for both the morning and afternoon recess periods. Guess we know why Pierce was trying to touch that kid's head on Saturday -you'd think he'd learn. I have to admit, I never imagined anyone would need to be instructed that its inappropriate to try and touch a stranger's head because their hair looks soft...
Pierce didn't want to wear his blue jacket to school because he thought that's how the second graders were identifying him and he didn't want to get chased again. Nora and I thought that might not be the best solution. We talked to him about NOT touching other people, boys or girls, without their permission. We also talked about finding an adult ASAP when a situation occurs that makes him uncomfortable. Then I taught him a technique we teach kids in karate class...
Most aggressors are not accustomed to being confronted. So Pierce and I practiced having him directly address his aggressors. Then we practiced it in the kitchen. The basic steps: face your aggressor and look him directly in the eye. Stand tall, hands at sides, stomp your foot and yell, as loudly as you can, "Stop! I don't like what your doing". The first time Pierce attempted it he looked at the floor, tried to pull his shirt over his knees and wasn't even audible. But a few more tries and he had the trick. Anna watched with great interest over her cereal bowl.
As you can imagine, I was very interested in hearing how school went that day. Nora called me from the car after she picked Pierce up from school, then handed Pierce the phone so he could tell me about it in his own words. Pierce said "They didn't chase me at the first recess, but then they tried to chase me during afternoon recess. I did just what we practiced -they started to chase me and I turned around and yelled 'Stop'. And they left." I asked him if he was scared and he told me "No".
As you can imagine, Nora and I are extremely proud of Pierce. Confrontation is never easy, even as an adult. Hopefully Pierce walked away learning a couple of lessons -1.) Don't touch strangers hair... and 2.) Stand up for yourself.
-Eric (Dad)
Tuesday morning Pierce told Nora that at recess the day before, he'd seen a 2nd grader on the playground whose hair looked soft and he tried to touch it. His reward? The 2nd grader and his friends chased Pierce around the playground for both the morning and afternoon recess periods. Guess we know why Pierce was trying to touch that kid's head on Saturday -you'd think he'd learn. I have to admit, I never imagined anyone would need to be instructed that its inappropriate to try and touch a stranger's head because their hair looks soft...
Pierce didn't want to wear his blue jacket to school because he thought that's how the second graders were identifying him and he didn't want to get chased again. Nora and I thought that might not be the best solution. We talked to him about NOT touching other people, boys or girls, without their permission. We also talked about finding an adult ASAP when a situation occurs that makes him uncomfortable. Then I taught him a technique we teach kids in karate class...
Most aggressors are not accustomed to being confronted. So Pierce and I practiced having him directly address his aggressors. Then we practiced it in the kitchen. The basic steps: face your aggressor and look him directly in the eye. Stand tall, hands at sides, stomp your foot and yell, as loudly as you can, "Stop! I don't like what your doing". The first time Pierce attempted it he looked at the floor, tried to pull his shirt over his knees and wasn't even audible. But a few more tries and he had the trick. Anna watched with great interest over her cereal bowl.
As you can imagine, I was very interested in hearing how school went that day. Nora called me from the car after she picked Pierce up from school, then handed Pierce the phone so he could tell me about it in his own words. Pierce said "They didn't chase me at the first recess, but then they tried to chase me during afternoon recess. I did just what we practiced -they started to chase me and I turned around and yelled 'Stop'. And they left." I asked him if he was scared and he told me "No".
As you can imagine, Nora and I are extremely proud of Pierce. Confrontation is never easy, even as an adult. Hopefully Pierce walked away learning a couple of lessons -1.) Don't touch strangers hair... and 2.) Stand up for yourself.
-Eric (Dad)
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