The Lindenbergs

I wanted to thank all you guys for your thoughts and prayers. Eric as you know came up to visit me in Maine last weekend. He presented me with a binder of all your e-mails, some of which brought me to tears (but I was peeling onions at the time).

I don’t think we usually get a chance to know what other people think about us or how we have impacted people’s live unless we are in a situation such as this. But I don’t think by any means that just applies to me. I think that we all would have a lot of good things to say about any of the brothers given the chance. We just usually do not have the time or reason to have that opportunity.

What has surprised me the most, given your busy and stressful lives, is how many people have taken the time to read my website. You never know if what you say or write will ever even be read. I have had a lot of people tell me that this has greatly impacted their lives (?) < < Who? ME ?!?!? Egads.

Note to self: Must get back to writing. Actually, with the new Talk ‘n Type® software, you simply talk (something I’m “efficient” at they claim) and the words just plop down on the screen ! < Which explains the run-on sentences and spelling errors.

As you know, the cancer as of the time I came down for Founder’s Day had just started to restage. This was at the main site of origin and had not yet spread. The doctors had given me 2-3 months, the same as if I had just been newly diagnosed. I had another follow up CT scan the Sunday Eric was up here in Maine. The results showed “no change” which meant the cancer had not progressed since the last scan over 2 months ago. This is good news and in and of itself is miraculous. However, Gemzar will work to a point and then (2-3 months) the cancer will become acclimated to it and will cease to be affective. The writing is on the wall, the horse is outa the gate. But, miracles are always possible.

The prognosis for Pancreatic Cancer is not good. It is the most aggressive and lethal form of cancer. The pancreas is the most active organ in the human body (with a few exceptions > > Ian and Bill).

I started back on Gemzar. It is supposedly the mildest chemo available (no hair loss or major nausea) but still after 19 treatments in total, kicks my butt. It’s like being run over by a Fed-Ex truck which then backs up and runs over you again! < < This all after placing a hefty QVC order too!

“Chemo bad! It yucky. Bluck! Bluck!

Many of you guys I had only known for a brief time when our whole lives are taken into account. Many people who have known me all my lives have said that they have learned more about me through the writing on my website than in all the years they have known me. If you get a chance, one more annoying plug: www.timberoaks.com

I am in the 5% group of people in which it is mostly (if not purely) genetic. Therefore, the day I was born, this was schedule to kick in at around the age of 38. I would not even be here writing this if it were 1997. Most of the technology for the surgery, narrow radiation fields, and Gemzar are relatively new. Having this in my genetic code was just part of the package deal for me to have booked a flight on this planet in the first place, so why dwell on it or worry.

But I do need to say one more time, in order for me to be writing the book I’m writing (assuming that is the reason for this ordeal) I literally need to be sitting on the fence, between this world and the next. Otherwise, I will loose my perspective, my advantage, and my whole train of thought will collapse.

I have met some pretty interesting people along the way that I would never have crossed paths with if it were not for this.

Life is full of surprises, some good and some bad. Turn lemons into lemonade. But be sure to add LOTS of sugar.

Thank you again!

Steve aka Niner
 

Keep up the good fight, Steve! We're all pulling for ya, Rugger.
 

Niner,

You were the best of Beta Class without a doubt. So what ever happened to Tener?? Keep up the good fight and let us know when the book deal is done. I want a copy (signed, of course).

Ian
(comin' in at #5.....)
 

Niner,

You were the best of your Class without a doubt. So what ever happened to Tener?? Keep up the good fight and let us know when the book deal is done. I want a copy (signed, of course).

Ian
(comin' in at #5.....)
 

I know that is either you Naylor or Ian. Tener was not the one I was actually in love with. It was her roomate, Rita Santa Maria Pinta de la Sousa (or whatever her name was). She was the 80's version of Paris Hilton if you recall, an heiress from Portugal. Not wanting to pass up the opportunity to marry into European royalty, I threw my hat in the bullpen. But... no such luck. All I got back were blank stares and restraining orders.
 

Niner,

this is your little brother (the straight one who didn't go into gay porn)... I have to say my man, I have been stunned into silence for a while. I mean you are so goddamn right about it all... it took some time for reflection on my part before I could say anything but now I am ready...

You have always been there for alot of us Steve and even now when times are hardest you are still reaching out to us and passing on the Niner/Rugger bits of wisdom.


Reality is, you are a good man, respected by your friends and cared for by us all. Dude, through your determination and peace of mind you are providing us with so much inspiration. Thanks for being my big bro, thanks for your revelations and thanks for not making me hang out with Eric aka" Derick Cruise" in college, or really ever.

And by the way, what was the name of that Gamma Phi debutante you used to "hang"with??

Miguel ZE96
 

You are in a lot folks thoughts and prayers these days. Keep up the fight don't lose hope and faith. You have more people on your side then you will ever know.

You and I didn't get to spend a lot of time together since you are a few years ahead of me but I will never forget the time you spent talking to me as a prospective pledge up by the PVs. We talked about weight lifting (that hasn't worked out so well for me ;-) and staying in shape (ditto). You loaned me your Arnold Schwartznegger (sp?) book and I still have it to this day.

Take care buddy
 

Thank you Jeff. Please don't worry about my Arnold book. I've long ago forgotten about it. I appriciate you guys keeping me in your prayers.

Actually dude, truth be told...

There has not been one solemn, lonely day I've woken up up since I loaned you ya that book in 1991 when I havn't wondered when the heck is Armstrong gonna get me my Arnold book back. If it is still at your domicile, perhaps proping up the leg of a sofa, could you mail it back to me so my Arnold library is complete once again? Or at least let me know it is ok (lie if you need to).

Miguel, I am despertely trying to find a phone # to call you. Jen left behing a "feminie garment" stuck in my fold-out sofa when you visited me in Maine a while back.
I am assuming it was a purchase at L.L. Bean's swanky langere department.

A surgeon? Egads. I though my job as your big brother (and having a hand in flunking your butt out of college) was complete. I believe you were with me and Patton that time we "borrowed" a certain UVa charter too.

And for the record Mig, you had the last reported sighting of a sheepish Eddie Walsh at the VCU bookstore (pursuing a doctorate post grad school at Georgetowne we can only surmise). By the sounds of it, he too could have used my Arnold book (and some Dexatrim).

Reah Leinster was the debutnant you refer to. I met up with her in Virginia a few years ago. She is still HOTTTT !! But I think after dinner at the Olive Garden, I scared her off to Budapest.

When I first joined the fire department, I was trying hard to fit in. So naturally, a grew a big moustach which look pretty cool. Half the chicks really dug it and the other half ID'ed me in a lineup as their stalker.

When discussing this with Reah at dinner she forced me to show her my drivers licence with that picture (me and the stache).

Her last comment I recall was (and this is an unedited direct quote): "Oh my God, you look like a gay German biker!"

Appearently, ruffies do affect one's memory. Right Nathan (bahh!). Nathan's knickname circa 1989 > > Ben, aka "Mr. Dover".

Back to my bat cave.

Sigh...